MRS & MRS

They spend countless hours together, performing, rehearsing, travelling and gossiping, so you’d expect one of the cabaret circuits top duos to know each other inside and out, right? Jason Reid decided to put this to the test this week, prizing Rinse out Your Haggis double act Bette Rinse and Mary Mac apart and putting them on the spot to find out who REALLY knows who better? Let’s play Mrs & Mrs [cue cheesy intro music]…

 

MARY MAC ON BETTE RINSE

Jason: When transforming into Bette does she…

A) Apply lips first
B) Apply eye make up first
C) Apply foundation first
D)  Put on her bra and boobs first

Mary answered: She always trowels that foundation on first.

Bette says: Always C) foundation first, dear.  Fresh from the concrete mixer [laughs]

RIGHT!

 

Bette’s cousin appeared as a character in which British soap from 2000-2004? 

A) Emmerdale
B) Coronation Street
C) Eastenders
D) Eldorado

Mary answered: [Paces up and down] Aaargh, I remember her talking to me about this too. Bugger! I’ll go for A) Emmerdale

Bette says: My cousin, Elaine, played Lynn Hobbs in C) Eastenders.

WRONG!

 

At which bar did Bette launch her drag career in 1989? 

A) Brief Encounter
B) Halfway 2 Heaven
C) Royal Vauxhall Tavern
D) The White Swan

Mary answered: YES! I know this one. It’s A) Brief Encounter.

Bette says: Before turning to drag I worked here as a bar maid, and I then popped my drag cherry here: A) Brief Encounter.

RIGHT!

 

Bette has been with her partner Andrew for?

A) 22 years
B) 24 years
C) 26 years
D) 45 years

Mary answered: It’s either B) or C). [Puts head in hands] I’ll go for B) 24 years.

Bette says: I’ve been with my Andrew for B) 24 years. And my drag hubby, you, (Jason) for eight years [laughs].

RIGHT!

 

Bette said that the most important quality in any partnership/friendship is? 

A) Loyalty
B) Sensitivity
C) Humour
D) Eccentrity

Mary answered: Must be C) Humour; she loves a laugh does our Bette.

Bette says: A) loyalty. It’s extremely important to me.

WRONG!

 

Of all her catchphrases, Bette said that which was her favourite?

A) ‘Yes dear’
B) ‘And the crowd went mad’
C) ‘Oggy, oggy, oggy. Cock, cock, cock!’
D) ‘3,2,1… Fuck ‘em’

Mary answered: This is a hard one! I’ll say D).

Bette says: I love them all but D) is my favourite. Altogether now: ‘3,2,1… Fuck ‘em’

RIGHT!

 

4 heels out of 6  

She knows her Bette like the back of her dainty, wee hand. We know who wears the troosers in this duo! 

 


BETTE RINSE ON MARY MAC

Jason: Mary’s favourite musical is?

A) Cabaret
B) Dreamgirls
C) Chicago
D) Spamalot

Bette answered: Got to be C) Chicago. Why? Because she thinks she’s Catharine Zeta Jones on stage.

Mary says: It’s B) Dreamgirls. I just love it!

WRONG!

 

Mary met her partner Brett…

A) On an Internet dating site
B) Through mutual friends
C) On Grindr
D) In a swing at Hard On

Bette answered: B) Through friends?? I think…

Mary says:  [laughs] It’s A) on an Internet dating site. LadsLads to be exact.

WRONG!

 

Mary’s first ever gig in London was at?

A) 79CXR
B) Freedom
C) Halfway 2 Heaven
D) Molly Moggs

Bette answered: A) 79CXR. I remember, she looked a right cunt!

Mary says: It was B) Freedom – at their Kinky Kabaret night.

WRONG!

 

Which part of Glasgow is Mary from?

A) Gorbals
B) Bears Den
C) South Side
D) Leith

Bette answered:  A) Gorbals. Sure of it!

Mary says: I hail from C) the South Side of Glasgow.

WRONG!

 

Mary’s favourite fellow Scot is?

A) Jeanette Krankie
B) John Barrowman
C) Susan Boyle
D) Rhona Cameron

Bette answered:  C) Susan Boyle. Because she fucking looks like her.

Mary says: Lot’s of respect for this woman: C) Susan Boyle.

RIGHT!

 

When transforming into Mary does she usually…

A) Put her dress on first after her face.
B) Put her hair on first after her face.
C) Put her tights on first after her face
D) Put her jewellery on first after her face

Bette answered: A) I bet she says hair just to be awkward but I KNOW it’s A) dress first.

Mary says: Trying to think now as I’m usually on auto-pilot! [pauses] Okay, it’s A) dress first.

RIGHT!

 

2 heels out of 6 

Tut! Tut! Tut! Better luck next time. Must try harder Mama Rinse. The old memory just isn’t what it was, is it dear? We still LOVE you though.

 

• Rinse out Your Haggis performs at the Admiral Duncan, 54 Old Compton Street, Soho on Weds 11th September and begin a four week run on Saturday 14th September.

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