It’s FASHION WEEK this week! Or was it last week? Well, either way, we’ve been drunk in hotels and art galleries a lot. That much we know. So it’s probably fashion week.
Now, as much as we berate it, we love a bit of FASHUN WEEK. If for no other reason than that it’s a good excuse to throw prosecco over Rosie Huntington-Whiteley and then pretend it was an accident. Smug bitch.
But what do we think about actual FASHION? We don’t know much about it really. We know the basics – like, we can tell our Vivienne Westwoods from our Victoria Beckhams, and we know Alexander McQueen did that splattery paint turntable thingy, and we know Carrie’s newspaper dress on Sex & The City was by Dior.
But when it comes down to it, we know N-O-T-H-I-N-G. Having said that, that doesn’t mean we can’t have an opinion on fashion. Fashion’s art, right? And art is subjective. So basically, anything’s fashion, as long as we say it’s fashion. Hooray! So here we go!
Those t-shirts you can buy in zoo gift shops
Naff crap, but make it fashion! Those t-shirts you can get from gift shops of rural zoos. You know, like with wolves and dolphins and crocodiles on. Or even better A SLOTH (see below).
Effy Stonem from Skins
Effy inspired an entire generation of kids (us included) to wear army boots and loads of shit jewellery, and to pout whilst doing ecstasy. What a hoot.
Priyanka Chopra’s look at the Met Gala
Everyone said it was crap but we were obsessed. Sort of an African safari/hooker fusion.
Anything from AUTBOX in Camden Market
Autbox is that one! You know the one! Just across the bridge and to the left, and stuffed full of loads of reflective and tie-dye and millennial pink crap. Love it.
Everything Rihanna’s ever worn
Even that weird green dress from the SOS video.
Everything Jacqui Potato’s ever worn
We’re not really sure what’s going on, but we think it’s genius.
Rosamund Pike’s whole aesthetic
We love Rosamund Pike! She’s got that icy coolness that we aspire to, except we always get too drunk. She loves wearing classy, understated numbers. We’d love to be classy and understated, but we always get too drunk.
Dinotopia
This was a sumptuously-illustrated series of books from the 80s and 90s, that were about a fictional utopia where dinosaurs and humans co-existed. Anyway the clothes were fab.
Piratey things
Floaty shirts, waistcoasts, tatty hair. The unwashed, salty look. Very in. Pirates are hot. We’ve never seen a pirate we wouldn’t shag.
That nightclub from The Matrix.
Cybergoth vibes! We love cybergoth. Anyone been to Slimelight lately?
Anyway that’s that for now. Check back next year for more fashion week musings. Or is fashion week more than once a year? Who knows! Cheers!
