QX’s brand new agony aunt solves YOUR dating/drinking/dehumidifying dilemmas!
She’s been called “the Joan Rivers of drag”, “a clown in a gown” and “a hateful cunt”.
But we just call her Bianca Del Rio, the winner of a little-known show called RuPaul’s Drag Race and QX’s new resident agony aunt.
Bianca’s taking time out of her busy schedule to sit down and answer YOUR problems, until she sells enough tickets for her London show that is – 27th July, Eventim Apollo in Hammersmith, get your tickets now, etc.
So here she is, the self-proclaimed expert of nothing with an opinion on everything. Strap yourself in, because if someone’s turning to Bianca Del Rio for advice, you know they gotta be desperate…
Dear Bianca. I’m from a large, strictly religious family and coming out to them was a bit of a nightmare, to say the least. It’s just one of those things that isn’t really talked about – like a big, pink elephant in the room. My brother is getting married soon and he’s told me I can bring ‘who I want’ to the wedding. My boyfriend thinks it would be a good opportunity to meet my family, but I’m worried how they’d react to him. What should I do? From Josh.
Uh, NO. Do not bring the boyfriend to the wedding because, first of all, the day is about whoever is getting married. Usually it’s a big fat girl – it’s her big drag show, her big moment to shine – and then you bring some sassy fag with you that has some fabulous bowtie or a little ascot and it’s going to take attention away.
I would honestly say bring someone like me – that would be more entertaining because at least at the reception I can get drunk and they can all stare at me. You do NOT want them to stare at your little faggot bottom boyfriend.
And God only knows what might happen if you brought him. I’ve been to weddings where gays were there and they got drunk and were feeling the fantasy, and tried to re-enact that whole dance section from Dirty Dancing, and it never really goes over well.
So I would say, go with an obviously real girl, or someone else. Because it makes sense; because if not then your uncle might not fuck you at the end of the night. Which is why you go to a wedding – for your uncle to go, ‘Hey hey little boy, remember our Christmas back in 1978?’
And if your uncle doesn’t fuck you, you’re ugly.
Got a question for Bianca? Submit it to [email protected]