Long gone are the days of giving the glad eye to that hot guy you see on the tube every morning or scanning the personal column of the local newspaper for that perfect WLTM. Thanks to the advancement of the web, new GPS features and the development of smart phones we now live in a generation where shags are as easy to arrange as a pizza delivery – although hopefully with less crust. And, while it still may remain as elusive as ever, love (or the next best thing to it) can be just a click away. This week, QX decodes the most popular dating, cruise and hook-up apps and online destinations. So, if you’re looking for an amazing husband or just an amazing orgasm – “there’s an app for that!”
SQUIRT
TYPE: Website – free or upgrade for full features
Squirt is one of the networks that takes things that little step further to guarantee that when you come to their site – you cum on someone else, too. Choose from standard hook-ups, cam shows, cruising spots, videos and cocktales submitted by members. You can browse via communities – so if you’ve got a thing for businessmen – you can filter out the twinks.
USERS: Any guy looking to get laid.
XXL
TYPE: App – free
For those of you that are familiar with XXL’s club night, you’ll know what to expect with their recently launched app. Generally attracting an older or more mature clientele (and often hairier), their ‘One app fits all’ slogan goes hand-in-hand with their club policy where all are welcome, just drop the attitude. Browse through like-minded men across the world – that’s if you’re bored of those burly neighbours that keep popping up on other apps.
USERS: Bears, Daddies, Chubsters, their admirers and everything in between.
GRINDR
TYPE: App – free or £6.99 a month for Xtra.
Global gay network Grindr and its six million (plus!) users remains one of the most popular dating apps around. Grindr shows you the men closest to you so it’s always convenient if you want a boyfriend (or blowjob) within the vicinity. Upgrading to Xtra allows users to scroll through profiles like a photo stream – and gets rid of those annoyingly irrelevant ads.
USERS: Fitties, fatties, faceless torsos and all that’s in-between.
TONKER / BRITISH MUSCLE BEAR
TYPE: App – free
British Muscle Bear Dating is exactly what it says on the tin. From juicy jocks to sleazy skin heads via horny daddies and of course, the bloke next door. Although perhaps not all in the one day or you may be a little chafed come sunset. A site with more testosterone than a drunk rugby team, and you can always meet new contacts at Tonker Club.
USERS: The hybrid man between muscle mary and burly bear.
RECON
TYPE: App – £7.99 for 30 Days
For guys that are pro-kinky and looking to meet up with like-minded kinky blokes – you’re bound to love the largest app for men with a fetish. So, if you’re not tied down – you soon could be (literally).
USERS: Leather lovers, BDSM boys and any other fetish freak.
GAYDAR
TYPE: Mobile Dating Site – free
Gaydar has been one of the largest online gay dating sites for quite some time now, so it was about time they got that onto a mobile. While the mobile site isn’t quite as seamless as some apps, some of the many advantages include the ‘Find Him’ features that allow users to search for men based on their common interests or what they’re looking for (relationships, fun, friendships) – not (just) their cock size – and the fact that it’s not restricted to Apple’s Disney-like, family friendly image policies allows profile images to be more ‘adventurous’.
USERS: From Muscle Marys to the ‘no-face-pic’ poofs.
www.gaydar.co.uk or m.gaydar.net/
MANHUNT
TYPE: App and website – free
One of the original ‘gay hook up’ sites, ManHunt jumped aboard the app bandwagon back when it started and has since proved quite successful. Not the best site for a dinner date – unless it’s you that’s looking to get eaten. Log-ins work for both the app and site.
USERS: Chavs, lads and ‘straight’ (ish) acting guys.
HORNET
TYPE: App – free
It may not be the catchiest name for a hook-up app, but there are a couple of things that separate Hornet from other gay apps on the market. For instance, you can browse boys anywhere in the world – not just those nearby. Always handy if you’re looking for a hand-job in Hamburg or a fuck in Frankfurt. Users can also upload more than one image of themselves (including private ones that can be unlocked upon request), so it’s easier to see if they’re your type or just have a good angle.
USERS: From those in the next road, to those on the next continent.
MISTER
TYPE: App – free
With their recent re-launch, the new features Mr. Right and I Am Mister lose the focus on hooking up and aim to encourage men to build better and more respectful relationships (so get up off your knees, dear) and to spend less time searching for men, and more time meeting them. Carl Sandler (CEO) says Mister is for “anyone who is sick of perusing endless photos of faceless bare chests…” so if you’re lacking personality – you’re fucked… Or not, it would seem.
USERS: Masculine men meets mummy’s boy.
SCRUFF
TYPE: App
Scruff was one the most prominent apps that was targeted at a more specific gay crowd, as opposed to general gays. Chances are if you’re under 23 and are sufficiently lacking in facial hair, you might feel like the kid who gets picked last in PE. Not because you’re fat, but cos you can’t grow a beard.
USERS: Bears, cubs, jocks and men that like their men manly.
MATCH.COM
TYPE: Website and app
Everybody who has a TV (or ears) has heard of Match.com; the website that promises to find you love within the first six months of joining or your money back. While it isn’t a gay-specific app/site it does have plenty of gay and bi-sexual users – a majority of whom are looking for love, not lust.
USERS: Men, women, gays, straight, bi-sexual, bi-curious, lesbian.
PLENTY OF FISH
TYPE: Website and app – free or upgrade for full features
“There’s plenty of fish in the sea” goes the saying, but in this day and age, “there’s plenty of dates on the app” seems more appropriate. With over 55 million users, Plenty of Fish is one of the biggest in the world – of course, product placement in a Lady Gaga video is bound to help. As a mixed-site users tend to be looking to meet up for coffee rather than cock – so it’s a great place to date and explore what’s good (and not-so-good) in a mate.
USERS: 55 million singles: all genders, all sexualities.
FITLADS
TYPE: Website and App – free or upgrade for full features
The website became largely popular for it’s online forums – where northern lads not only rip the piss out of anything that’s currently trending but also rip off their clothes with ‘Post a cock pic’ threads. They later branched out to an app.
USERS: Chavs, scallies and trackie-enthusiasts.
CRUISME
TYPE: Website
The app that lets you find the nearest fuck by post code – perfect for those moments when you just don’t want to fancy traipsing across town for a 30 minute fumble. Of course, the option is always there if you did fancy finding that hot fuck in Hackney when you’re over in Ealing.
USERS: All sorts, from quick fuck fixations to neighbourly sluts
GAY ROMEO
TYPE: Website – free
On PlanetRomeo – the universe that helps you “find what you need” with their powerful search engine. Hugely popular across Europe, users are ranked under categories Hot Butt, Hot Cock, Great Body, Gorgeous Face, etc. Unfortunately there’s no Big Wallet category.
USERS: Plenty of Casanovas, not so many Romeos.
GAY-PARSHIP
TYPE: Website
If you’re looking for The One, rather than just The One Around The Corner That Will Relieve Your Hangover Horn – then perhaps it’s time to check out gay-parship.com. “Serious” about dating, the site uses personality tests to find guys you’re compatible with – so you won’t have to clang the cutlery around just to avoid an awkward silence.
USERS: Gay/bi-sexual men (and women) looking for love.
GUYSPY
TYPE: Website and app – free
GuySpy is an online site that combines cruising with a blog – so you can see what’s going on, as well as who might be going down. Option to browse guys that only have nude pictures, or if that’s a bit too cock-sure then just view the ones with their kit on.
USERS: Average Joes
THE BEST OF THE REST…
Flirt, date or just play ‘Yes, No or Maybe’ on Badoo. If you haven’t met the bear of your dreams from one of the apps we’ve already mentioned – Growlr has over 2 million members on their social network. View a variety of members’ photos and videos at Maleforce. “Life is pretty straight” without the Bender app.
Photo by patrickmettraux.com
