Friday 22nd February
Big hairy muscle men. That’s what these guys are all about, be they young aspiring hunks in training or fully realised Daddies. There’s something about a big muscled older guy in a harness that has our knees buckling, and if they have a big bushy stash we really can’t help ourselves. We just grab our ankles without even thinking about it… All good things come in two over at Bloc South, with 2 major rooms, 2 huge dance floors, 2 bars, 2 floors of cruising areas and only a short 2-minute walk from Vauxhall tube station. When it comes to fumbling around in their dark corners, you can be sure that there’ll be at least two of you getting into it. Coincidently, 2 drinks are also what it takes for us to get chatting guys up so be sure to keep an eye out for us heading to the bar for the second time…
TFN – Totally Fekking Nude
Get Totally Fekking Nude this Friday. There’s nothing like stripping down to your birthday suit and getting to know like-minded lads in the buff. We’ve almost made it through the winter, but don’t wait until spring to shed those layers of thick knits. Taking over the fab Covent Garden sauna, get ready for a night of exploring their facilities whilst getting to know fit guys. They’re open to all kinds of guys, so whatever your type is you’re sure to find him over at TFN. Every Friday they welcome the naughty gay and bi men of London for a night of friendly fun. Busy with guys of all ages, especially evening drinkers from Old Compton Street who realised the club has plenty up for offer.
The Love Yourself Bash. Loving your curves and swerves is what Thicc is all about. A body positivity bash where the go-go dancers are EXTRA juicy. They’re letting their femme flags fly in an evening dedicated to the sassy creatures out there who like it extra thick and bouncy. Live your fun femme fantasy at the night where you can be whatever you want, and catch one of Rougie’s pop-up drag shows.
Saturday 23rd February
SOS – Soul On Saturday
Take one quick glance at this week’s headlines and you know that we all need saving. Bringing a big dose of disco to save us from impending doom will be Soul on Saturday. The hunky host that does the absolute MOST, Roy Inc will be on hand to make sure you’re getting into the soulful spirit. This monthly night always serves up great vibes, and after a few drinks, you’re damn sure to be feeling yourself to some Marvin Gaye. Taking to the decks this week are Terry T-Rex and Jeanie Crystal who know good music, and exactly what the crowd’s gagging for on a Saturday night. Soar like an Eagle on a strong gust of Soul jams and seventies sass.
Let us give you some constructive criticism. Get yourself a construction worker to sleep on top of and it is guaranteed to solve all your problems. But where would one find such a big burly gentleman? Well, FUNNY you should ask. This week XXL are paying homage to all those hotties you passed on building sites during your morning commute. Get up close and personal with several builders bums at this night of two-stepping to chunky beats. Knock back those beers and get up close and personal with the builder of your dreams to the hot mixes of Fat Tony. Grab your hard hat and high-vis, because this one’s going to get hot and heavy VERY quickly.
We love anything beginning with ‘mid’. Midnight is when we head out, we never wake up before midday, and we love any hottie in an outfit showing off his midriff. Oh, plus a Sunday of Midsummer Murders goes down a treat. February is a big month for Beyond as they welcome international special guests to turn the party at their weekly event, along side their super talented residents. It’s the twelve-hour party that’s always there for when you don’t want the night to end. This week they’re going full Clown Town, so ruffle up your collars and back-comb that rainbow afro. Be you a Killer Clown from Outer Space or Pennywise himself, head over for a night of high-camp, high-octane clubbing madness.
Privates on Parade with Lauren Harries!
Covergirl Lauren Harries (pictured) takes over The Glory for a debauched evening with her Privates on Parade! The trans trailblazer and former child genius will be storming to the stage to perform her best-loved hits. In celebration of Glory part-owner Colin’s birthday, Harries will be the Marilyn to his JFK wishing him a very sensual Happy Birthday, Mr President. Also storming to the celebratory stage is drag delinquent Holestar who’ll be serving up some hip-twisting tunes at the bar, with Adonis’ Shay Malt pumping out bangers downstairs with DJ’S N-Gynn & Robert Ouch. Sure to have crows reeling as they’ve just jumped off the Walzer, a night of two-stepping into the early hours. Just be sure to not be one of the broken hearts Lauren will be leaving in her wake.
Sunday 24th February
Sunday Cabaret at the RVT
There’s something about Sundays and Cabaret that shouldn’t work but SO does. Like chilli and chocolate, or Trinny and Susannah. Casting aside boring Sundays of shoving your face full of pizza and binge-watching Netflix are the RVT with their brand spanking new Sundays of Cabaret. It use to be the most sociable day of the week, but in recent years people are locking themselves indoors. In the words of an on-ice Gemma Collins: BORING. The Tavern invites titan of the drag circuit Myra DuBois (pictured) to take to the stage for an afternoon of songs and snide. Then taking over with some banging tunes later in the evening will be Sunday staple DJ Simon Le Vans who’s joined this week by the adorable Graig Jones. What better way to end your week than with a pint and a room full of pansies.
SBN & NBN
One of the busiest gay naked nights out around. Every single Sunday they burst open the doors of Fire, welcoming over 400 guys who are looking to make good use of the dance floor, and maybe have a go with the UKRed play space. Made of over 10 tons of iron and steel, spread over 35000 square feet, it’s quite the cruising experience. Their banging DJ’s will be pumping out the hits to get you in the mood for… well, banging. All clubbers are invited to check in everything, including their attitudes, for an evening of clubbing madness. At 5 pm things really heat up with a hot and heavy live XXX show, this week brought to you by heart-throb John Thomas and Scottish lad AJ Alexander (pictured). For you guys who like to maintain a little mystery, you can join the party in your undies from 6 pm.
Fire Main Entrance, Vauxhall SW8 1RU. SBN 2pm – 10pm, show 5pm. NDN 6pm – 10pm. Members £14, guests £17, includes first drink and coat check. Claim your free membership at JamieHP.co.uk.
There’s some wizardry behind that bar at Freedom. Mixing a bit of this and a bit of that, an eye of newt or two, and without fail they pour out a mystically delicious cocktail. It’s just damn magic. We’re starting to think they might be serving up a dash of love potion in our Strawberry Daiquiri, always damned delicious and have us LOVING the adorable bar guys. After a few of them, you’ll find us reclining on those plush green sofas, making eyes at whoever finds themselves unfortunate enough to be in our eye line. We’re usually there right after work to make the most of their fab Happy Hour deals where we can grab a signature cocktail for just £5.50. No wonder we’re Uber-ing home in a drunken haze before 9:30 pm.
They’re showing no signs of slowing down this month, turning the ripe old age of TWELVE. God damn it, they’ve seen a lot considering the join’s barely even a teenager yet. They were serving up the pints in buckets on the big V day with an open draft bar, and they’re keeping the celebrations going. They’re serving up 2-4-1 on draught Heinekens between 4 pm – 7 pm, which is PERFECT for match days. For a place that serves up this many pints, it’s surprising that the bar guys barely look like they’ve ever touched anything over than a vodka soda. They’re what the youth refer to as ‘skinny legends’, and we just can’t stop staring whenever we’re in there. We decided that we were way more beer belly than ab-tastic years ago, but at Ku, we can enjoy a bit of both.
Duke Of Wellington
Give it some Welly, dear Duke! With gay historical dramas being all the rage right now, there’s something that feels very right about the Duke of Wellington. Where tradition meets gay stuff. Speaking of traditions, you just have to check out their pub quiz nights. Every Wednesday they throw on the gayest quiz around, where you can be up to win some serious cash. Grabbing that mic and prancing across the pub floor will be Topsie Redfern, who’ll have probably just knocked back seven RedBulls, or Martha D’Arthur who we hear is open to bribes provided you’re just her type.
Sorry to tell you guys, but the Pet Shop Boys were completely damned wrong. You shouldn’t be ‘Going West’. Anyone who’s anyone knows that East is where it’s at. Without the bustle of central, the snootery of North, the hoity-toity-ness of West and… whatever they do down South, East has it all without the attitude. The Old Ship really sums up why we just love heading East. A welcoming crowd, a nice relaxed vibe going and that old-school style which we’re into. It’s the kind of place you’d head with a couple of friends just to let it all hang out, metaphorically, of course, otherwise, you will be asked to leave. Grab a game of pool or catch a performance from an icon of the London drag scene. This week they have the incomparable Miss Jason and the always-hilarious Tiffany Wells.
There’s something to be said about a Thursday night out. Friday at work is usually a throw-away anyway, passing the time thinking of which of your Tinder matches you’re going to have a sweaty Saturday session with, you may as well go full throttle on a Thursday. They’re one of the few Soho venues that are open into the AM and we’re so glad that they are. Once that first sip of Mojito passes our lips we know we’re in it for the long-haul. It usually starts with a few cocktails, but once our judgement’s a little…hazy, we’re ordering one of those Giant Porn Star Martins. YUM.
81 Wardour St, Soho W1D 6QD