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The daddy craze is growing and here’s why you should date a daddy.


There comes a time in every man’s life when adult life gets to be a bit too much, so before you go full adult sexy baby, why not grab yourself a Daddy!

We love a daddy. They’re big and cuddly, and just super sexy. We can’t get enough, and feel that everyone should date a daddy at least once. We’ve gone ahead and summed up a few of the BILLION (yes, billion) reasons YOU should date a daddy:


He usually pays

Right, this isn’t a given. Just because he’s lived a few more years doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s picking up the check. Never presume that he’s better off, and you’re not doing this for a free dinner (unless you are, a girl’s gotta eat). If you’re really a daddy-lover then you should feel more than ready to pay for his meal. But him paying really adds to that daddy dynamic of being treated like the little princess you are. Today it might be dinner, tomorrow who knows. A weekend in Paris can never be more than a few dates away.

He’s Experienced

Not to state the obvious, but he’s probably had more sex than you which means he really knows how to get DOWN. It’s rarely one of those bend me over and stick it in situations; it’s a whole production. He’s matured sexually when porn was feature-length, and foreplay was a thing you did properly. The millennial attitude is to get to it as soon as possible, but that ignores all the good bits that come before.

Dealing with those… issues

Yes, the big hairy elephant in the room. We all got that strange sense of titillation when we sat on Santa’s lap at Christmas. Now you’re of sexual age and you can really explore these feelings. Taking care of yourself and facing the world is tiring, so let someone else take care of you for once.

You’ll get Id’d

Walk the streets of Soho with an older man on your arm, you’ll be getting ID’d everywhere you go, which sounds annoying but is actually really nice if it hasn’t happened in a while.

Dad Bod

This phenomenon took the media by storm a few years ago, but the homosexual has always known that the body of a virile older man has always been a thing of beauty. Oscar Wilde has his hot young Bosie, and he was so into Wilde’s undeniably ‘dad’-ish bod! Google ‘dad bod’ right now and if it gets to three scrolls and you’re still not just a bit turned on, there’s something wrong with you.

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Have your Saturday night, he’ll be yours on Sunday

There’s always that awkward relationship between the guy you’re dating and the crazy night out you’re desperate to have. Do you invite him along? Is he going to be on you all night? Will you be able to mingle with him on your tail? Could you even flirt your way into VIP with him there? Probably not. That’s where a daddy comes in handy because you know he won’t want to come along to the genderqueer sex positive safe space hang out in Mitcham Junction… Then when you’re coming down on a Sunday, he’ll be there to drag you to look at art, or just to comb your hair and tell you you’re pretty.

Beard

Keep your crappy, upper-lip pubic hair and scraggly chin on Justin Bieber types. Give us a big whopping thick beard any day. One that leaves lesser men cowering behind lampposts. BIG. LONG. HAIRY. BEARDS. Yes.

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