Last Christmas review ★★★★☆ by Dylan B Jones
Every so often, a film comes along that’s so unforgettably absurd, so indelibly terrible, that it becomes an instant cult classic. Last Christmas, the new festive frolic from writer Emma Thompson and director Paul Feig (Bridesmaids), is fully deserving of such an accolade, down to the last saccharine bauble.
There’s been no shortage of terrible cinema of late. The recent Aladdin reboot was pretty dreadful. Godzilla: King of Monsters was equally dreadful. Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston’s big buzz Netflix romcom Murder Myster was obviously dreadful. But they were dreadful in a soulless, joyless, overproduced way.
Last Christmas is a whole different ballgame. It’s utterly, and we don’t use this term lightly, batshit. It’s also fully aware of its flaws, in such a hilariously confident way that it deserves points for sheer audacity. Actually, it’s a bit like the band The Darkness. Yes, that’s it – imagine if The Darkness were incarnated a film, in which Michelle Yeoh plays Santa (!) We’d even go as far as to say that it gives Tommy Wiseau’s classic car crash The Room a run for its money.
Part of what lends this film its wild, brain-numbing cringe factor, is the fact that the two leads have, shall we say, interesting approaches to acting. Let’s be real – Emilia Clarke got lucky with Game of Thrones. She was perfect for that character. But not really for any other character. We love you Emilia, but…stick to perfume ads. Henry Golding of Crazy Rich Asians fame plays her love interest and also…just…no. It’s all a bit A-Level drama student.
Oh, but there’s more. Not satisfied with having written a breathtakingly ridiculous script, Emma Thompson then shows up as Emilia’s mum, complete with…an Eastern European accent?! Not to sound snowflakey (although it is Christmas) but is that ok?! There are some accents which it’s fine for Brits to do. American? Sure. Australian? Who cares. French? Hmm, yeah, go on then. But Eastern European? By one of the most posh and privileged women in Hollywood? Maybe not?! If you’re Eastern European and have seen the film, we’d be interested to know your thoughts.
The film ends with a scene that’s just indescribable, so we won’t try too hard, but it involves a stage, fairy lights, several disabled homeless people, woodwind instruments and Emilia Clarke singing.
This is, easily, the worst film in a decade to get a widespread international cinema release. But…we enjoyed it? Maybe it’s festive cheer. Maybe it’s the four glasses of mulled wine we necked beforehand. Maybe it’s Henry Golding’s irresistible grin. But despite the terrible script, bad messaging and even worse acting, it’s the most fun we’ve had in a cinema this year. And yes, we’ve given it four stars. We hate ourselves. MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Last Christmas is out now.
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