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She’s turning 60 years of age, and this diamond jubilee of fabulosity is about to take over London. This one isn’t just another Madonna party. This is THE Madonna party. The sheer capacity of The Clapham Grand means this is sure to be the biggest celebration of the queen of pop. Presented by the only people known to have a PHD in Madonna-isms L-U-V MDNA, it’s going to pack the ultimate punch of smash hits form a career that spanned since (what feels like) the beginning of time.

Adding a little spice to the night will be performers from the freshest queens in London town. We all know Madge likes a British accent so these queens are exactly what she aspired to become. The performance stylings of HERR, Cheryl Hole, Margo Marshall, TAYCE and Vanity Von Glow will rouse a crowd into a frenzy. MDNA, MDMA, they both get you feeling high as a cloud. The West End Gospel Choir will be ready to take us to church, making us as virgins once more. It’s as if the Grand has answered your Like a prayers.

The Madonna Only means non-stop Madonna, so thank the lord she’s had multiple personalities over the years to keep us entertained. From her being funky and young in the 80’s, her being a cowboy/pimp lady to her being a matador… for some reason. Due to health and safety regulations you are advised not to wear a cape since it’s just asking to be yanked down some stairs. Also safety goggles must me worn if you decide to sport a particularly pointy cone-bra. These Madonna hits are brought to you by the three horse-hung men of the Madgepocolyps Lady Lloyd, Johnny Kalifornia and David Robson. It’s going to be off the gold-crucifix-chain.

It’s time to pay homage to the queer icon of our generation, and the past three generations. There’s a Madonna for everyone. Madonna is love, Madonna is life. The career is 35, flirty and THRIVING.

Friday 17th of August, The Grand, 21 Street Johns Hill, SW11 1TT. 10pm – 3am. Grab your tickets over at, just search ‘Madonna – 60 Years of the Queen of Pop’.


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